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4 ways to tell someone they're not invited to your wedding

4 ways to tell someone they're not invited to your wedding

Written by Katie Byrne

It doesn't have to be awkward! Here's how to deal with the 'where's my invite?' question in style...


Picture the scene: your guest-list is drawn up, your invites are sent and the RSVPs are starting to flitter in. So far, so good - your initial quibbles about who does (and doesn't) make the cut for your very tight guest-list have melted away and you're about to start on the table plan.

And then! Disaster - someone asks why they haven't been invited to your wedding. Awkward, yes - unmanageable, no. Here are four ways to deal...

#1 Be honest and... Blame your space allowance

Small venue? You'll have had no choice but to be super-selective with who made the guest-list cut, so tell them that! If they don't understand, start grumbling about how the lack of wall space has meant your dream of a luxe KimYe-style floral installation has had to be down-sized - as you start talking rose quantities and petal thickness, watch their eyes glaze over and know that you've bored them into submission.

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#2 Be honest and... Blame your budget 

A tight budget is a more-than-justifiable reason to keep things intimate - and if person X doesn't understand than it's probably for the best they're not attending anyway. 

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#3 Be honest and... Tell them you haven't invited anyone from work

Colleagues at weddings can be a bit of a minefield. If you have one really good office friend, do you invite just them, at the risk of them having a day felt lonely and bored? If you have space and budget, inviting several could be a good call - but if you don't, it might be easier to swerve it altogether. If someone asks, simply explain you haven't invited anyone owing to restrictions. 

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#4 Be honest and... Let them know before they can ask

If you're worried a distant relative or long-lost friend might be outraged about their lack of invite, let people know in advance. A status on Facebook or a quick round-robin email will let people know what the situation is; if it's an extended branch of the family you're worried about, ask your parents to help you soften the blow. Chances are they might not ask but pipping them to the post just in case could be easier in the long-run, as well as helping to spare any potential blushes. 

Plus, they might not be coming to the wedding but that's not to say you can't arrange a post-celebration get-together to catch-up! The non-invite to the wedding might feel awkward but it can actually serve as a neat springboard for a proper meet-up, and a rekindling of an old friendship. Yay!

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